Saturday, November 2, 2013

Whatever Souls Are Made Of, Ours Are the Same

My life has always had background music. Any experience I had has had a song that went with it. From that mentality, Salone has had many contenders.

Fun’s song, ‘Some Nights’ was the top for a while, particularly the bridge where the singer is familiarly wondering if this all was worth it (So this is it? I sold my soul for this?) Also by Fun, ‘Carry On’ has made its way onto my wall at my house (When you’re lost and alone and you’re sinking like a stone, carry on).

Times like today where I went junking and made out like a bandit, all I can hear  as I strut away is ‘Thrift Shop’ by Macklemore ( Probably should have washed this, smells like R. Kelly sheets, but shit, it was 99 cents!)

But the most applicable at all times is hands down ‘With A Little Help from My Friends’ by the Beatles.

I know this is a tune I’ve sang before, but my people here are my people for good.

I was recently talking to a good friend from home who I haven’t talked to in a while and they asked me about Salone, and why it was hard for me. I realized that I don’t know how to explain it really to someone who doesn’t live here. I don’t know how to speak American anymore. I didn’t realize I had lost it because I’m around my Americans all the time, but they understand the random Krio that slips into the conversation, the Salone sounds that we use to convey tone and don’t write home when we talk about how sometimes flogging makes sense.

There’s more to someone speaking your language than tonal muttering and guttural sounds. There’s an inherent connection that we all share here that doesn’t seem to translate to friendships in the States.  There’s nothing external about anything here. I mean, we scoped each other out when we first got here and then we all promptly stopped shaving and flossing, and started getting random rashes, losing muscle and smelling. But no one cares. Because we’re all so gross, no one really notices.

Once you strip all the American trappings away, you get down to what actually matters. There are so many times that my best friend and I look at each other, usually when I’m trying to explain why fashion is important or she’s rattling off the stats to every team in the Premier League, and we know that we never would have been friends in the States. That thought both terrifies and mystifies me. How much of your Identity is rooted in external things? Would I have missed out on one of the strongest relationships of my life because I thought sarongs were more important than soccer balls?

This is true with pretty much everything here. You don’t have your things here. You don’t have your clothes, your makeup, or sometimes even your dignity. But without all of that, you’re stripped naked, down to as real as you can be. And when people can love you for that, they’re soul mates.

I’ve always believed in soul mates. To much mocking from my friends, I always believed that there was one perfect person for everyone and your paths would cross when they were meant to. That when you met that person, you would know. I still believe this in the romantic sense. But more strongly now, I believe this with your friends. Your true friends who know you past anyone else.

The Salone 3’s that have been here for a year already have been our lifelines in this country, and I know we want to be the same for Salone 5 when they get here, so…

For future Salone 5- here’s my most important piece of advice I can give you from this point in my service- Love your family. Your Peace Corps family is the only way you’ll survive here. And they’re the greatest people your life will ever have. Make them yours.

 

 

“He’s more myself than I am. Whatever souls are made of, his and mine are the same.”

-Emily Bronte

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